I wrote this one yesterday at fiction workshop (remember, i also ran a marathon in the morning, so excuse any spelling or idea mistakes!)
(workshops directed by Mr Spurgeon Thompson)
The Lollipop
I am asleep. Deep, deeper, more sunken than any other nights.
My open eye is making the sheets,
snore by snore, body so exhausted
the eye works so slowly that I am left white
The carpet in the room stands up billowing dust
a boy appears behind and throws it out in the pool.
I get up stark naked, hands over jewels, and I see him, full.
“I have a lollipop to replace the carpet” he says
He is cute, I’m mad, reminiscence of Da Vinci’s quests.
“Can I tell you your secrets?” he asks
I say he would have no clue, no rhyme
Boy in fury starts unraveling this ball of yarn
“Hold the lollipop!” I start licking just to hear about
the day I last peed in my bed
how I made my father laugh when she died
the fastidious lollipop she gave me the night she passed away
Just as both my eyes tackle the sheets
he jumps off the window into the pool
to land flat on the carpet
as he departs I still hear him shout my secrets in the distance
“You cheated from my test and I got busted!”
“the bike you lent me is still in my dad’s garage!”
“your father was screwing my mother too”
“I am the only one you can trust”
I shall not trust him if he ever reappears.
The lollipop is nearly done, my eyes leap for the carpet in the pool.
2 comments:
Well... replacing the carpet with a lollipop, sounds reasonable to me! Do you think i have to worry about it? :)))
Ok... to get serious for a change... i really like your fiction text!
I like the fact that the boy threw the carpet out of the window and although it looks like he did it because he needed it to fly away on it, i think that he really did it to get your attention! :)
The point is that you succeeded in creating an image for me.
The whole thing came alive in front of my eyes, so... i supposed Mr.Thompson ought to give you a good grade for that! :)))
Have a great day!
thanks Lilith!!! DO you live in Cyprus? If you do, we have workshops month in month out, and twice a year we run a three-day writer's retreat. This year it will be in April. It will be held in Kakopetria. The previous retreat in Kakopetria in October was a success! I will post an invitation soon.
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